“Why, God? Why did you bless her with a healthy child, and not me?” This is a prayer I prayed countless times in the darkest part of my infertility. Very quickly the feelings of jealousy began to set in. At the beginning of trying to conceive, I would notice pregnant bellies and smile, thinking to […]
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Author’s Note: This post contains mention of pregnancy after loss. If that’s not something you want to read about right now, feel free to skip this post. A rainbow baby is a term to describe a baby born after loss. Just like a rainbow after a storm symbolizes hope, a rainbow baby is the peace
To summarize briefly, my recent history has included: My first miscarriage was to 9-week-old twins. The second miscarriage happened very early at five weeks and is sometimes known as a chemical pregnancy. Tests After multiple losses, there is a series of tests my doctor did to make sure they didn’t contribute to miscarriage. This included:
What I’ve been doing since my last miscarriage Read More »
My chemical pregnancy. I was convinced I was going to get pregnant the month after my miscarriage, but I didn’t. In the second month, I was convinced I wasn’t pregnant. But then I took a pregnancy test and got a very, very faint second line. I thought it was a fluke. I didn’t tell anyone
I was pregnant, and then I wasn’t Read More »
Trigger Warning: This article discusses miscarriage and pregnancy loss. After my ectopic pregnancy, I remember someone consoling us by telling us we had a little baby in heaven. Up until that point, I hadn’t thought much about the baby. I hadn’t known I was pregnant until I found out that the pregnancy was nonviable, so
Where Are My Babies? Read More »
I write this story, not because it’s an unusual story, but because it is such a common story. This is not the story I planned to write. I wanted to write another pregnancy success story about my miracle, a rainbow baby after an ectopic pregnancy. But this is the story I was given. In the
My Miscarriage Story Read More »